Allow, Be, Intend

Things are changing significantly and very rapidly in my reality. Not material things so much (though there are also changes there), but in the bits and pieces of my psyche (mind/ego-self/whatever) that haven't yet been... exorcised, might be a good word.

Right at this moment, I am aware of an aspect of myself, a very, very deep, core aspect which keeps itself well hidden, that believes, "I am worthless, useless, and not worth listening to" and has a great deal of pain associated with that belief set. I've been aware of this aspect for a long time, but it's very core, and quite elusive. Now, it seems to be standing in the glaring bright light of absolute awareness. It's not comfortable.

This part of self was generated when I was very young. It follows the "wounded child" archetype. I know it is not necessary to keep this (in fact, it's unnecessary to hold ANY attachment to ANY aspect of the material self!). I am unsure how to release it, other than, I suppose to keep looking at it and keep experiencing it in the bright, pitiless light of awareness, until it gives up on its own.

There are many ways to deal with these things. I used to practice a lot of them. Years of therapy made me very good at self-examination. I am familiar with EFT and with other techniques for deflating or removing attachments and beliefs and so forth. But at this point in my awareness within the space-time continuum, all that stuff seems like hocus pocus and ritual.

I haven't got anything against ritual (or hocus pocus, for that matter), but it seems like those things are... I don't know how to put it. Ritual is essentially (and in simplified terms) a means of generating focus and directing energy, and while I don't have issues with that, it seems kind of like training wheels to me now. I feel like, yeah, I could do all that stuff, go through the steps, blah blah blah, but it strikes me as kind of... empty, maybe... Hard to articulate.

I've become aware of a lot of very subtle things about that which might be termed energy and manifestation and such (those words are woefully inadequate, but they're the best I've got). I haven't written it down because it's so subtle and so esoteric that there's not much point. I can use standard terms to kind of point to it, but I can't see any reason to do that, honestly. And I can't see any reason to go through a bunch of ritual to dissolve the attachment(s) to these beliefs that are now rather uncomfortably in my awareness.

Like I said, this is a completely new game, and it calls for new approaches. Or, a little more accurately, no "approach" or "strategy" at all. In fact, that may be the key to a lot of things, right there. Instead of "taking an approach" or "using a strategy", I need to let go of all that "management" and just allow and be and intend. Hmmmm.....

(You see, this is why I write. The act of writing as if someone is going to read often brings clarity. Thank you, to whomever does or does not read this.)